The Shallows (M)
Starring: Blake Lively, and a seagull
THE problem is this: why would a marauding killer shark choose Blake Lively over the world’s supply of whale meat?
And having made the decision that Blake is a tastier morsel – OK, hard to fault that logic – why would our chompy friend then pursue her in a truly psychopathic fashion?
But those quibbles aside, The Shallows does have the potential to become something of a B Grade monster movie classic.
Blake’s doing a little surfing at a remote Mexican beach when she blunders across the dead whale … and along comes the chompster, who selects her surfboard as an entree.
Cue hours spent on a rock, watching the rising tide and avoiding our very bitey 3.5-metre friend.
Of course, many others are not so lucky so Blake spends a lot of time clinging to the rock like a limpet, with her dear friend Steven Seagull by her side.
A lesser friend would have wrung the bird’s neck and used it as a shark distraction but, to her credit, Blake sticks to her feathered friend like glue.
And so the battle with the pea-brained and very grumpy Noah waxes and wanes, but it’s pretty entertaining stuff, and well-shot.
It won’t trouble the Academy Awards much, but it’s about the best of the dross that’s floating around at the moment.
Take a big bite – I dare you.
– Jason Beck
