In a year that started well but became a little disillusioning as it went along, reviewer Tania Phillips looks at the movies that are indelibly etched on her mind for all the wrong reasons.
5. Pirates of the Caribbean
Captain Jack Sparrow searches for the trident of Poseidon while being pursued by an undead sea captain and his crew and helped by look-a-likes of his previous offsiders.
This was a movie that felt like we’d seen it all before – groundhog day with privateers.
4. Fifty Shades Darker
With dialogue so wooden it attracted termites, distinctly unsexy sex scenes and a plot so thin that it hardly existed it’s the even more excoriating sequel to Fifty Shades Darker.
While Jamie Dornan offers a slightly more nuanced performance this time it can’t save this from being a shocker. And now we have the third one on its way – please, please make it stop!
3. King Arthur Legend of the Sword
Director Guy Ritchie retells the oft told Arthurian legends.
This was supposed to be the first of a major franchise. No word yet on whether that is still happening. Robbed of his birthright, Arthur comes up the hard way in the back alleys of the city.
But once he pulls the sword from the stone, he is forced to acknowledge his true legacy. This is a loud obnoxious version of the legend. Enough said, really.
2. Rough Night
In the ultimate in cringeworthy silliness Jess (Scarlet Johansson) is an engaged politician who reunites with three of her college friends for a wild bachelorette weekend in Miami.
The night of hard partying soon takes a dark turn when a male stripper accidentally dies at their beach house.
Hilarity apparently ensues in this crass, silly, cringeworthy romp that Johansson will be no doubt trying to expunge from her IMDb. Kate McKinnon deserves special mention for her Australian accent.
1. Snatched
There was no competition. It was evident walking out of the cinema – heck, it was probably evident walking in. This was always going to be my worst.
Amy Schumer plays Amy Schumer only this time she is even louder and more obnoxious and gets kidnapped, along with her mother, in a remote jungle. Unfortunately, she finds her way out.
Goldie Hawn tries hard, but the dialogue is trite, the premise is thin, and the jokes are flatter than last week’s pancakes.
