By DAVID NAGEL
“THERE is help out there – suicide is 100 percent preventable … suicide is 100 percent preventable,” says a passionate Craig Membrey as his right fist lands solidly into his left palm.
His passion stems from a knock on the front door of his Berwick home, at 5.11am, on 18 March 2011, where police informed him that his 16-year-old son, Rowan, has stood in front of a train in Springvale and taken his own life … it happened at 11.50pm the night before.
“Nine months earlier, I grounded him for drinking and smoking and the next time I saw him was in a morgue,” Membrey reflected as he prepared to speak as an Ambassador for Beyondblue at a function at the Pakenham Football Club on Saturday.
“My dad was strict, and he had a saying, ‘if you mix with dogs’ sons, you’ll get fleas’, and that’s what happened with Rowan, he just went down the wrong path.”
Craig Membrey does not want any parent to experience the pain he now feels and has dedicated his life, and his truck, to Rowan’s memory. He spent $180,000 re-building the vehicle, his pride and joy, which stands as a symbol of a father’s love for his son, and of his intense drive to help others.
“I’m trying to turn a bad thing into a good thing and see if I can help people out,” he said.
“It rips me open to talk about it in front of everyone, but people need to understand that there are people to help you out there. You’ve got to step forward and speak up. It might feel like you’re in a dark place, but there is help, don’t be embarrassed by it.
“I’ve had people with tattoos and ear-rings, blokes who look like they could take on 50 people in a pub, share with me that they’ve got depression. We’re all human beings run by the same type of machine, we’re just different people, but we can all help each other.
“The world’s changed, there’s not that same level of communication anymore, that face-to-face time where you can look in someone’s eyes and see if there’s a problem. We just need to make that effort to ask for help and to reach out if a friend is in need.”
Membrey said he didn’t have to look too far when it came to looking for motivation to continue on his journey.
“I’ve got a six-year-old son, Jack, and a nine-year-old daughter, Leah, I don’t want to go through another issue like this again, and I want to protect them. That’s one of the main reasons I do this, to raise awareness and try to protect kids from around this area.”
“I get up and speak, but I’m no hero … I’m just a father who lost a son.”
If you are experiencing personal difficulties, contact Lifeline on 13 11 14.
