By Garry Howe
Laura Beck wants to see an easing of Covid-19 restrictions around end of life situations after enduring the heart-break of her mother Josie Hagen spending most of the last days of her life alone in a Canberra hospital ward.
The Pakenham schoolteacher and mother of three tried several times to travel to Canberra but was unable due to lockdown.
Even Josie’s husband Jaap Baaij was denied entry into the hospital until the last moments of her life.
“I get that we are in a pandemic, but there has to be exceptions around end of life,” Laura said.
“I know people are missing out on weddings and birthday parties, but you can plan another wedding and you’ll have another birthday party.
“You don’t get another chance to say a last goodbye to a loved one.”
Josie, a mother of four, was visiting her eldest daughter in Canberra when she had a seizure and was admitted to hospital. She was diagnosed with lung cancer that spread to her brain and remained there until she passed away on 15 August.
Covid-19 lockdown restrictions in Victoria kept Laura and her siblings from travelling to be with their mother in the final weeks and even her husband and Canberra-based sister encountered problems when the national capital was locked down as well.
Josie was only allowed one visitor per day, so if Jaap had been her eldest daughter could not visit.
Towards the end, a delay in transferring her into palliative care – which has lesser restrictions – meant that neither Jaap nor her daughter could visit, so Josie was alone for most of her final days.
Her husband was finally let in for the final moments.
“We really feel robbed of our mum’s final few months,” Laura said.
“It’s just heartbreaking and very frustrating. I try not to think too much about it because I get angry.
“Because Mum had brain tumours she was confused, disoriented and forgetful. She got quite scared towards the end and having no-one there with her I think she just gave up.”
Laura’s siblings and Josie’s four sister would have liked to have been there to support her.
The funeral also presented difficulties.
Jaap had to apply for exemption to come to Melbourne for the burial. He got a Covid test in the week leading up to the flight the health department said it was looking good if the result was negative.
The day before the Friday funeral service he still didn’t have a clearance and ended up boarding the plane, knowing that if he didn’t he would miss the service.
He was held at Melbourne airport for five hours until the clearance came through and, after attending the service, he had to spend 14 days in hotel quarantine by himself.
“I know how much I am struggling and I think how he must be feeling locked away by himself while mourning his wife,” Laura said. “It has just been so horrible.”
To make matters worse, Laura’s husband Jason was battling cancer at the time as well.
The only fortunate part of the whole affair was stumbling upon Josie’s final resting place at Beenak, north of Gembrook.
The family wanted Josie buried with her parents at Cranbourne Cemetery but were told the full house sign was up there. So they searched for alternatives and were thrilled to come across the picturesque Beenak Cemetery, where she is now resting peacefully.
A life filled with the joy of faith and family
Josie Hagen was born on 11 December 1949 in Denekamp in the Dutch province of Overijssel, to Martin and Joanna Hagen and had 10 brothers and sisters.
In the late 1950s she and her family migrated to Australia to start a new life and eventually settled in Berwick.
In the late 1960s Josie met her first husband Theo through the St Michael’s youth group in Berwick. After dating for a couple of years, they got engaged and were married at St Michael’s church on 27 June, 1970.
They moved into a house at Fountain Gate, and exactly a year later they welcomed their first child. A little over a year later Chris was born, followed by Laura in 1975 and finally Libby in 1981.
Josie worked many different jobs in her time, including at Just Jeans and Woolworths Dandenong and K-Mart in Cranbourne. She volunteered at the Dandenong Hospital, where she would go from room to room, ensuring that the patients had flowers and that their vases were full of water.
Josie loved music and always had music on in the house, with the likes of ABBA and Nana Mouskouri blaring constantly. She sung in bands and was a regular at the Cuckoo restaurant.
A devout Christian, Josie at one stage she was a temporary Pastor at the Cranbourne AOG. Her love and belief in God never waned, and it was this belief that would guide her down many paths.
Chris remembers Josie loved taking the kids to the one day cricket matches at the MCG.
“We would park our car at the Malvern railway station, so we could get an ice cream from Dairy Bell and then catch a train into the city. We loved watching the cricket but I remember mum making us leave early at times when she became disgusted with the crowd’s behaviour, which is kind of ironic when she always made us sit in Bay 12, next to the infamous Bay 13 crowds.
“Other fond memories I have is of Christmas at home. Mum loved Christmas and the festive season, and she would have the house extensively decorated, and always went over the top with the food that she cooked. Once we had finally eaten through a week’s worth of leftovers, mum would then make batches of Olle Bollen which we also loved eating and will now miss.”
Around 1990 Josie and Theo separated and went their separate ways.
On 12 October 2002 she became a grandmother for the first time and would eventually have 12 grandchildren – Brendan, Aaron, Michael, Luke, Matthew, Jessica, Bella, Isla, Lilly and Alyssa, who she loved dearly and she was loved by them.
In 2005 Josie started travelling frequently to Holland, Belgium and Germany, and in 2010 while performing her teaching ministry she met her second husband Jaap Baaij.
They became a couple in 2015 and were inseparable. They married at the Cuckoo restaurant on 10 August, 2016.
They continued travelling overseas for Josie’s ministries and there was hardly a time they weren’t together, and he stayed by her side right up until the very end.
